Miss You in a Heartbeat
by Arluinuial
Summary: This is a songfic, yes it sort of has spoilers for the 5th H.P. book. And the song is a Def Leppard song! Anyway, it's about a romance Sirius has and yeah.


"Miss You in a Heartbeat"  
  
(The title of this songfic is also the title of the song used in it, "Miss You in a Heartbeat" by Def Leppard. So copyright goes to them. DL ROCKS! Oh and I don't own Harry Potter or any affiliated characters or places or. yeah yeah you get the point.)  
  
Dedicated to Brittany: my supplier of Def Leppard and my muse for the duration of writing this. (If an evil slave driver who forces you to write CAN be a muse. - -;;)  
  
/I believe that there's something deep inside, that shouldn't be from time to time/  
  
The room was dark, the house silent and in Sirius' soul was pain. He was alone as usual; he couldn't escape the loneliness. Fourteen years in Azakaban and now solitary confinement in the house of his fathers. Leaning back against the pillows of his four-poster he sighed and closed his eyes, the silence of the dreary house deafening him. The Order of the Phoenix were all on their own missions and the kids had gone off to Hogwarts. Sirius was hopelessly lonely and going slight mad.  
  
Members of the Order rarely spoke of Sirius; holed up in his room. Tonks occasionally went up to try to console him but she eventually stopped when he refused to even speak to her. It came as quite a surprise to him when, after weeks of seeing no one, Tonks burst breathlessly into his room babbling something about a Sorceress from the States joining the Order. He ignored her and after putting up with a few more minutes of her prattle he rudely ordered her from his room. Tonks stalked from the room in a huff, giving him the finger and slamming the door behind her.  
  
/Sure found out, thought love was such a crime. The more you care the more you fall/  
  
Another day and still an empty house. At about midday the silence was shattered by the ring of the doorbell and the sudden outbreak of shrieks from the portrait of Sirius' mother in the front entryway. Sirius was roused from his stupor of self-loathing by the realization that this couldn't be a regular visitor because they all knew by now not to ring the bell. He expected someone else to answer the door but then remembered that no one else was around. With a sigh of pure annoyance he leapt from the bed and stomped down the stairs.  
  
"Oh shove it you old hag!" he spat as he passed his mother's painting.  
  
"Blood traitor! Shame of my flesh! Abomination!" the painting screamed in response. Ignoring it- he'd become quite good at that these days- he flung open the door with an irritated glare on his handsome face. The glare in his eyes melted into a look of shock as his gaze fell upon the stranger standing on the broken concrete steps. The stranger was an extraordinarily pretty young woman of twenty with thigh length golden hair, mesmerizing violet eyes, and a tiny waist. Her face was sweet and her smile utterly charming. When she spoke her voice was soft and lilting with no definable accent, though Sirius was sure that she was the American Sorceress of whom Tonks had told him.  
  
Sirius continued to stare for a moment, the shrill voice of his mother pouring out into the street. The woman cleared her throat uncertainly then spoke, "I'm Lyra Rowanwood. I'm here for."  
  
"Yes, come in," Sirius held open the door and let her pass. Once the door shut he noticed the distinct absent of his mother's enraged wailing. Turning, he saw that Lyra's fingertips touched the canvas of his mother's painting; the young woman's body surrounded by a glowing violet aura. When she moved away the aura dissipated and she turned to Sirius, foreseeing the questions he was bound to ask.  
  
"What did you do?"  
  
"I put her to sleep."  
  
"How."  
  
"My magic is special. I can use my body as a conduit for it rather than a wand," speaking quickly she reached over and pulled shut the curtains that normally covered the painting. She smiled at Sirius, "So. who are you?"  
  
His eyes widened, ashamed at his lack of manners. But it could only be expected as he hardly ever interacted with other humans anymore.  
  
"Oh, I'm Sirius. Sirius Black," he shook her hand.  
  
Her previously angelic smile few wicked when Sirius introduced himself. "Ooh, the convict? I always did like bad boys," she winked.  
  
A flash of Sirius' old sense of humor lit his face at her comment. "Are you coming onto me?" he questioned with a sly grin. Seconds later they both burst into laughter.  
  
"I think," Lyra smiled, "I'm gonna like it here."  
  
/No need to worry, no need to turn away; 'cause it don't matter anyway/  
  
Despite the fact that she was a Yank, the other members just adored Lyra. She and Tonks became fast friends, Mrs. Weasely coddled her as if she were one of her own children, Kingsley Shackleboot was impressed with her knowledge, and Bill Weasely flirted shamelessly with her. The other members all had similar reactions and it wasn't long before she was admittedly everyone's favorite houseguest. Sirius in particular was attracted to the girl, not that it mattered anyway. He doubted that she would ever give him the time of say, let alone become romantically involved with him, Besides, they rarely even spoke to each other except in passing. After her first day there she and Sirius didn't engage in anymore flirtatious conversations. As usual, he kept to his room and stayed out of everyone's way; fearful that a cross word might unleash his rage.  
  
On a rare occasion when the house was actually full, Sirius was in his mother's room feeding Buckbeak when a sharp rap on the door interrupted him. A bit disconcerted by this unusual occurrence, Sirius opened the door slowly, making sure to block anyone's view into the room. Seeing that it was Lyra at the door he stepped back instinctively, not wanting to get too close to her, as he didn't fully understand his feelings for her. She looked behind him and her eyes lit up at the sight of Buckbeak. Completely forgetting why she came there in the first place, she pushed past Sirius and stared at the Hippogriff; her violet gaze matching Buckbeak's fierce orange glare. After only a few seconds Buckbeak dropped to his knees, bowing to her. Lyra stepped forward and tentatively stroked his feathered head. Buckbeak shoved his weight against her, encouraging Lyra to continue petting him. Sirius watched in shocked silence as Buckbeak pranced around trying to impress Lyra and cooing whenever she scratched him. The once arrogant Hippogriff was now acting like a neglected puppy.  
  
Lyra was delighted with Buckbeak, saying that he reminded her of the horse she had back home. A little put off by the fact that his Hippogriff was completely in love with the girl, Sirius proceeded to usher her from the room and ask her what it was she wanted. Thinking for a moment, Lyra then spoke, "Dumbledore's returned and he wants to see you."  
  
"What," he said aggravated, "he couldn't tell me himself?"  
  
She grinned. "He's old, what do you expect? He probably couldn't make it up the stairs. Besides, he's in the front hall looking at the picture of your mother. I think he fancies her," with that she flounced from the room. Of course she was joking when she made her comments about Dumbledore. With a sigh Sirius went to find him, still amazed at how quickly Lyra had bonded with Buckbeak.  
  
/Oh oh oh I'd miss you in a heartbeat. Oh oh oh. I'd miss you right away. Oh oh I'd miss you in a heartbeat/  
  
Following that event, Lyra came to see Buckbeak often and began spending considerable amounts of time with Sirius. He grew quite used to having her there, as she didn't often leave the house. Somehow, just knowing she was near made being trapped there a little more bearable. Sirius was plagued with the idea that maybe, just maybe, there could be something between them. But he quickly banished these thoughts away, not wanting to have his hopes dashed per usual. Still, he couldn't help but wonder what might be.  
  
/'Cause It ain't love if it don't feel that way/  
  
Sirius couldn't get Lyra off his mind. Every waking thought was of her; her smile, those bright intelligent eyes, the shining golden tresses of her hair. He desperately wanted to pull her into his arms, run his hands through her hair, kiss her all over. but it was just a fantasy. She could never feel about him the way he felt about her. Of course there were the looks she gave him; longing glances. But no, he was fourteen years her senior. Lyra deserved some strong young man, not a slightly insane old convict. She did spend a lot of unneeded time at the house however, and this perplexed him. Others would go out on business for the Order but she tended to stay in the house and deal with problems reported by other members. In fact, when Dumbledore was unavailable members sought out Lyra; who had the miraculous ability to right all wrongs. So of course Sirius couldn't understand why such a powerful and authoritative figure like Lyra would want to bide her time in a decrepit and musty mansion with an angry hermit like himself. Finally, he confronted her on the matter.  
  
/When we touch I just lose my self control/  
  
Sirius knocked on Lyra's bedroom door and then opened it when her voice rang out, telling him to come in. She stood in front of the armoire's mirror, her long hair loose as she brushed it. When she turned to him he was immediately reminded of Titania, the Faerie Queen of Shakespeare's works. She was barefoot and clad in a light airy violet summer dress that brought out the color of her eyes. Her thick hair fell in shimmering waves down her back and little tendrils of it curled round her ears. Sirius had the sudden urge to drop to his knees before her in worship. then he remembered that she was not, in fact, a Goddess and restrained himself.  
  
"What'd you need, Sirius?" she asked quietly as he watched her.  
  
Sirius got right to the point. "Why do you stay here all the time? It can't be that you like this house. Hell, I grew up here and I hate the damn place." His words were bitter.  
  
"The house is fine. I just. I worry about you being here alone. It can't be good for you. And I." she stopped and tuned her gaze away from him. Sirius took a step closed, hope blossoming in his chest. "Yes?"  
  
"Well Sirius I like. being here. Being here with you, "still she refused to look at him. Sirius moved even closer and took her hand in his. When their skin met he felt electric thrills course through his body and his hear pounded ever faster. With his other hand he lifted her chin, his dark eyes entranced by the light in her own. He saw there fear but also longing, yes he was sure of it now. She wanted him as badly as he wanted her.  
  
"Lyra," he whispered, his gaze holding hers, "I'm in love with you."  
  
Her only response was a nod, but she was shaking as she put her arms round his neck. The emotion in her eyes was intense. She was anticipating something. Sirius leaned down to kiss her and when their lips met it was like Heaven, Hell, and everything in between. In his mind trumpets blared, drums pounded, blood and fire flowed through his veins. The first kiss was soft, the next heated and feverish. They held each other in passionate desperation. Oh what pain it caused him to finally touch her, feeling as if his heart would burst; yet it was so much worse not to have her, to only wish that she were his. His lips moved away from hers, seeking her neck and once there sucking and kissing with reckless abandon. She let him do it, he felt her lips on his own neck as they continued their frenzied embrace. He could feel her racing pulse and the desire in her touch.  
  
He soon found that his hands were lost in the silken masses of her hair; fingers entwined round golden locks of it. She clung to him, still nuzzling his neck as he kissed her delicate collarbone. She pulled his face back up to hers and kissed his mouth once more before stepping back and breaking their crazed hold on one another. The heat and passion of their kisses drained away from him but tension s till hung in the air. Lyra gave him a small smile that said more than a thousand words ever could; she loved him. She exited the room without speaking, leaving Sirius there to savor the memory of their encounter. He could still taste her lips, feel the softness of her hair, the fragrance of her skin. for maybe the first time in fifteen years Sirius Black was truly happy.  
  
/A sin sensation I can't hide/  
  
Sirius tried to keep their love affair a secret, so of course the other members knew that he and Lyra were together; though no one spoke of it. Mrs. Weasely did not approve and Bill was a bit jealous. Everyone else generally approved, as it was a commonly known fact that Sirius was horribly lonely. Having someone to love him would do Sirius good.  
  
When the kids returned from Hogwarts for winter break they immediately took to Lyra, and she herself felt a particular attachment to Harry since Sirius cared so much about him. A few days into vacation Lyra cautiously approached Harry with the subject of her relationship with Sirius. She wasn't sure of how Harry felt about his godfather seeing a woman only a few years older than Harry himself. Finding Harry alone in the drawing room she sat down in a wing-backed chair near him.  
  
"Harry," she began, "I've wanted to know what you think of my. relationship with Sirius."  
  
"I think it's excellent," Harry said simply before returning his gaze to the book he had been reading. Surprised, Lyra asked him why.  
  
"Now I don't need to worry about Sirius being locked alone here all the time. And I can tell you really care about him," his attention was gain locked on the book's pages. With a smile Lyra left the room.  
  
/To love is easy, it ain't easy to walk away. I keep the faith and there's a reason why/  
  
Four months had passed since they'd met and Sirius was still falling farther and farther in love with Lyra. Every day with her was better than the last; her personality and wit never failing to surprise him. It was unbearable for him when the inevitable finally occurred and Lyra was forced to return to America for a few weeks to do work for Dumbledore there. Those proved to be the darkest days of Sirius' life, darker even then his years at Azakaban. There it had been a longing for revenge that consumed and sustained him, now it was love; which was so much harder to suffer.  
  
During those days without Lyra Sirius' thought became bleaker than ever, as if a Dementor had finally managed to take his soul. He began to doubt whether he was even worthy of her. Why would such an attractive woman full of life want a dark bitter wraith of a man like himself? His misgivings were only reinforced by dark mutterings from the demented house elf, Kreature. And of course in the deepest pit of his heart there always laid the fear that they would not survive Voldemort's return to power. All of his fears were banished by the first kiss Lyra gave him on returning to the house.  
  
/Now, I ain't big on promises, but I'll be true to you/  
  
The night that Lyra arrived back at the house was stormy and miserable. She was quite content to listen to the wild rain, warm in bed and safe within the protective haven of Sirius' arms. A fire roared in the bedroom's grate and the inviting room seemed a stark contrast to the gale tossed world outside. With a yawn Lyra kissed Sirius a few times then shifted in his arms and few asleep. Her dreams were disturbing.  
  
A noisy room, explosions, screams. Dedalus; dead. Tonks; dead. Lupin; dead. Others falling. Black, black masks everywhere. Swirl of dark cloaks. The crack of wands. Spells flying. Curses flying. Hexes flying. Eyes of a Death Eater. Cast a spell. Dead eyes. Sinister laughter. A woman. Sirius angry. A flash of green light. Sirius; dead. No. No. Not Sirius. Never Sirius. Voldemort, laughing. Evil laugher. Incantation. Purgatory. Death always Death. Vacant stare. Tears that fall like rain.  
  
Lyra sat up and cried out, shivering in fear. Sirius was instantly awake and holding her in his arms as she tried to relate her dream to him through her now rapidly falling tears. It took awhile to quiet her down and she was finally able to tell him of her dream. Sirius kissed her and assured her that everything was fine, that Voldemort could never find them. Never.  
  
/'Cause I'd do 'bout anything for someone like, baby for you/  
  
It wasn't long after Lyra's return that Voldemort ultimately struck and her prophetic nightmare became a reality. A meeting of the Order of the Phoenix was in session when a loud explosion issued from the front entryway and Sirius' mother began to howl. All those present in the kitchen sat in tense silence, wands at the ready as numerous pairs of feet pounded above and the painting's screeches were abruptly cut off. Every personage present sprung into action as the kitchen door was blasted from its hinges. This attack was unexpected but that didn't mean they wouldn't fight.  
  
A group of masked Death Eaters rushed into the room, shooting out curses from their wands left and right. Order members retaliated with their own counter curses and spells, blocking attacks. The one clean kitchen had become the battle site for a magical melee. Death Eaters dropped left and right, but Order Members did too. Stunned bodies hit the floor with sickening thumps. The first causality was on the Death Eater's side, but the first to die in the order was Dedalus Diggle who was lit on fire by an Incendio spell cast by Macnair. Tonks went down next as she was blasted with the Reducto curse from Narcissa Malfoy. Lupin had a binding spell cast on him and then a hover charm that bashed him into a wall until he fell unconscious. Other order members fell, wounded but not dead. Voldemort's minions were not giving up, the Death Eaters had their command from the Dark Lord; destroy the Order of the Phoenix at all costs.  
  
Lyra was dodging curses hurled at her by Lucius Malfoy as she tried to reach Sirius who was sparring with his cousin Bellatrix LeStrange. All of Bellatrix's stunning curses had missed, but if Lyra's dream was correct then there was another curse that wouldn't. She turned to stare right into the pale eyes of Lucius, the eyes of a Death Eater. With one word from her lips his body imploded, his eyes dull and his body dead before he hit the floor. Lyra finally made her way to Sirius and gave a short scream as she heard Bellatrix utter the word "Avada." Lyra pushed Sirius out of the way and was hit full force with a jet of green light as Bellatrix finished the spell, "Kedavra!" The world seemed to go in slow motion then for Lyra. She saw Sirius face as she fell, feel the pain burning in her chest, but somehow she wasn't dead. Yet she knew she would be soon. Gasping as her body thumped on the floor she managed to whisper an incantation she had learned that would instantly drag it's victim's soul into the very depths of hell.  
  
"Corpus. Purgatorius." she uttered and watched through glazed eyes as Bellatrix clutched her throat as if choking. Bellatrix then fell to her knees, eyes turned towards the ceiling as a ghostly vapor rose from her mouth then disappeared; she slumped forward, dead.  
  
/Oh oh oh I'd miss you in a heartbeat. Oh oh oh I'd miss you right away. Oh oh oh I'd miss you in a heartbeat/  
  
Sirius had witnessed this all in utter horror, it all seemed to happen so quickly. Bellatrix's curse and Lyra rushing forward, then Bellatrix dying and there was Lyra; survivor of an Avada Kedavra curse. or so it seemed. When Sirius knelt and took her in his arms, it was obvious that she would soon die. The only explanation for her living this long had to be the difference between her powers and wand magic. She had once told him that spells from a wand took more time to actually affect her because of her varied power. He held her and looked into her glassy eyes that were faded to a cloudy purple. "No."he whispered and a tear slid down his face, splashing on her waxen cheek. The blood was draining from her face and her breathing was slowed. She couldn't speak and he didn't know if she could even actually see him. He murmured that he loved her, hoping she could hear. With a convulsive shudder she drew her last breath then lay still, her once laughing light-filled eyes vacant and dim. Sirius pulled her to him and kissed her now cooling lips, not wanting to believe that she was dead. The skirmish still raged around him but Sirius could only cling to his lover's lifeless body and his tears fell like rain.  
  
/'Cause it ain't love if it don't feel that way/ 


End file.
